Lemon Creme Pie

Good Tuesday morning!

NOTE TO DAWN - Have I told you I love you a little more than Robin? Shhh. Don't tell her. I don't want to hurt her feelings. (Dawn has 301 friends on Facebook... where she left my website address... for the contest.)

NOTE TO JILL - Hi, girl. Yes. I told your story, and you can find it in my April 12, 2009 post. I didn't mention your name because I wanted to try to get a picture of you to go with it. The night of the dance recital (when I planned on taking the pic) you were leaving when I was coming in and everything was super hectic. If it's okay, I'll set up a time with you for a "Barry Manilow Groupie with a Professional Barry Manilow Back-Up Singer" picture in the near future and reveal all.

As you might have guessed, all the new Gallery Pics are from a Girls' Night Out Roxie and I attended at Amy's house (my cousin). We were JUST going to have a nice dinner and play Pictionary with all of our daughters (five moms and five girls), but it turned into so much more. Just a lot of "simple pleasures."

First the girls swam in the pool while the moms lounged around on the back patio on a cool July evening. (What's up with that? Usually in July and August, we are sweltering even up to 8:00 or 9:00 o'clock at night. It was an incredibly comfortable evening.) Then the golf carts came out and the girls rode through trails cut in the woods behind Amy and Stephanie's homes. (Stephanie is another cousin. Her daughter is Abbie. She lives next door to Amy.)

And to top off the evening, before we even began the official festivities, nine precious puppies, three kittens and a potbelly pig (named Pork Chop) were everywhere getting all the love and attention they so richly deserved. Roxie and I practiced all the way to Amy's... "Roxie, don't you want to take a sweet little puppy home with you tonight?"

"No! No! You can't make me!" she was to scream. In reality, I had to pry a wriggling little ball of fur out of her clenched arms before we could get into the van to come home, but that was probably the only low point in an otherwise fun evening.

Oh, and I have to mention the food. Stephanie loves to cook so she prepared the meal. Sweet and sour pork, bean dip, buffalo dip, tiny rolled ham sandwiches, fresh cucumber strips from Amy and Stephanie's garden, etc. And the desserts... chocolate cake and chocolate pie to name two. She used the new cookbook Cook Yourself Thin. The chocolate cake had beets in it. That's right! Beets! And it was good! It was very good, in fact. I looked through the cookbook, and I'll go ahead and recommend it today... We won't wait until Friday for Book Day. It's in paperback and it has tons of great recipes. Everything we had last night was delicious. (And I can honestly say it was the first time I ate beets willingly and THOROUGHLY enjoyed doing so.)

I also want to mention the Hot Mamas annihilated the Crazy Drivers. (The girls derived their name from the way they drove the golf carts. Scary stuff!) The Crazy Drivers were not gracious losers... but I would have to admit the Hot Mamas weren't the most gracious winners either. Oh, well. Maybe next year, girls!

A Little Story About "Having Things Removed"

Last week, Mikie took me downtown to have a little "pigmentation" removed from under my tongue. It looked like someone had lifted my tongue and drawn a little line with a Sharpie. "Hmmm. That's a little odd-looking, isn't it?" That's what my dentist said. That's also what the oral surgeon said one week later. Not what you really want to hear, is it?

"Oh, I've seen a million of those... and it's called a __________... and when you have one it usually makes you smarter!" That's what you want to hear.

But since I wasn't getting the correct responses, I decided to have it removed. "You'll need to have someone here to drive you home because we have to put you to sleep." Ahh, man. Anesthesia... really?

"I have to have major surgery," I told Mike as I left the doctor's office that day.

"You mean they have to put you to sleep for a few seconds while they remove your Sharpie mark?" he calmly responded.

"I have to have an IV and EVERYTHING... AND they called it an ODD PIGMENTATION! That's how I'd like for it to be referred to from now on, please." I responded a little bitterly.

"Be honest. They asked you if you had put an open Sharpie in your mouth recently, didn't they?"

"No," I lied.

Last Thursday, Mikie drove me to the doctor's office for my "major surgical procedure," and they took me back immediately. NOTE: I have to give a shout-out to a nurse whose name I don't remember for the best IV stick I've ever received IN MY WHOLE LIFE. She was amazing and I didn't feel a thing!

My nurse kept asking me questions, and for the most part I answered her honestly. Then my anesthesiologist came in. This is the guy you have to be careful with.

"Hello, Mrs. Faulkner. How are you today?" he asked.

"Fine," I answered as I braced myself for another onslaught of questions.

"Well, before we start your IV drip, Mrs. Faulkner, may I ask how much you weigh?"

I gave him my normal anesthesiologist answer. "I weigh 250 pounds."

Now this is a tricky one. Your main goal is to make sure you have enough anesthesia in your system to NOT wake up in the middle of the procedure. However, you do not want him to nod immediately and go to the next question taking your answer as the gospel truth.

"Really?" he said, glancing at me. "And how tall are you?"

"I'm about 6'5"... more or less," I responded with gusto.

"Really?" he said, again. Moving closer, he leaned down and said, "Mrs. Faulkner. It is evident you are NOT 6'5" OR 250 pounds. Now, do you want me to get your weight and height off your driver's license or do you want to start talking?"

Well, I DEFINITELY didn't want him to get my weight off my driver's license. There was no way he'd give me enough anesthesia to knock me out if he thought I was 5'3" and 130 pounds. (I always put my "enchanting" weight and height on my driver's license.)

In the end, he had the "correct" information and the procedure began. (Oh, did I mention this was a Two Parter? Sorry. I slipped a "blog teaser" in there, didn't I? You'll have to tune in tomorrow for the rest of the story.)

I guess we'll just have to move on to the recipe for the day!

Lemon Creme Pie

Now, this isn't your easy, four-ingredient pie, but it sure does look worth the effort! You'll need:

2 cups sugar
1/2 cup cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 cups cold water
8 egg yolks, lightly beaten
2 tablespoons lemon zest
2/3 cup fresh lemon juice
6 tablespoons butter
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 9" pie crust
2 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened
3/4 cup confectioners' sugar, divided
2 cups heavy whipping cream

1. In a large saucepan, combine sugar, cornstarch and salt. Gradually whisk in water. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Cook for 1 minute, whisking constantly. Remove from heat.

2. In a separate bowl, gradually add 1 cup hot mixture to egg yolks, whisking to combine. Add egg mixture into remaining hot mixture in saucepan. Return to medium heat, and cook for 1 to 2 minutes, whisking constantly, until mixture is thickened. Add lemon zest, lemon juice, butter and vanilla. Cook for 1 to 2 minutes, whisking constantly, until mixture is smooth and thickened. Remove from heat. Reserve 3/4 cup lemon filling and set aside.

3. Spoon remaining lemon filling into pie crust. Chill for 30 minutes.

4. In a medium bowl, combine cream cheese, reserved lemon filling and 1/4 cup confectioners' sugar. Beat at medium speed with an electric mixer until smooth. Carefully spread cream cheese mixture on top of lemon filling in crust.

5. In a medium bowl, beat whipping cream at high speed with an electric mixture until soft peaks form. Add remaining 1/2 cup confectioners' sugar; beat until stiff peaks form. Spread whipped cream on top of cream cheese mixture.

6. Refrigerate until read to serve.

This recipe was taken from the July/August 2009 issue of Southern Lady. Remember? The magazine you were supposed to buy this past weekend. Did you? Did you buy it? If so, look on page 70 for pictures of this delicious pie.

Now, I have to be honest. I decided NOT to make this for the guys at the X-Box party Sunday evening. I fed them (and I fed them well), but since this recipe calls for a little effort on the cook's part, I didn't want it inhaled without any savoring or chewing involved from the recipients.

Don't get me wrong... I love feeding the boys and their friends. It's an amazing thing to watch... the speed and dexterity in which they can make platter after platter of food disappear. But this recipe just screams, "I want to sit in your mouth for just a few seconds while you enjoy every single forkful of deliciousness before you swallow."

And so, that is what it shall be! Mikie loves lemon pie and Mikie shall have a lemon pie in the not-so-far-away future. There. I have declared it! And you know what happens when I declare something!

Have a terrific Tuesday. Tomorrow's Seasonal Tradition will be one you will want to add to your list (I hope).

Take care, and I'll talk to you tomorrow.